OK, I'll play nice and catch you up gradually. This may take a while, so grab a cup of something ( I promise, it won't have to be strong, this time. LOL)
It's been a while...... a long while...... but although not completely over the moon, I'm not so far underground that all I need is a shovel with dirt to finish the process. If you've been reading my blog for a bit, you know that nothing ever goes easy, streamlined or even halfway according to any other rule not to mention (dare I say it out loud?) PLAN, and that bit hasn't changed. But I think I'm just a bit better equipped to deal with things.
What did the trick, was an email from my sister in law, after I asked if everybody was ok, since I hadn't heard from anybody, and was basically told: "Nothing personal, but F-off!" That's as clear as a message can get! Sent one back that I will not bother the family again, and I meant it. I didn't sleep for 3 nights wondering if I could have done more, better, different and caught a whopper of a migraine because of it (on top of everything else) and decided enough was enough. I'm no longer trying to appease people that will not listen, at ANY level of my personal interactions. Somehow, making that decision grounded me. I will do what I can, I will help where I can, I will care about people as far as I can handle it, but mainly, I will make sure that my family of 2 is taken care of, and if anybody, and I really mean ANYBODY has anything to say, about this family, they can take a long walk off a short pier as far as I'm concerned. Nothing personal, of course! LOL.
SO! Next on my project list, is cajoling the Gemeente into letting me start my business, and starting to enjoy the second chance we've gotten almost 6 years ago, by taking a day here and there and do things that make us happy, even if it is on a baby shoestring :-)
THAT part of the program happened yesterday. I'd been talking to my cousin (my moms sisters daughter - I can never keep that straight! LOL) about the family pictures she has, from when her moms house got put up for sale, and that she has no idea who some of these people are.... Her daughter had to make a family tree for school, and also came up empty, so we exchanged information for about a year. She's closer to the archives, and I had more family information as in dates, names and lines.... It was decided we would get together, and finally made it a date, yesterday.
Mike dropped me off at Schinnen station at 7.25 to load up my OV-chip card, and I hopped the train at 7.32. Had my morning coffee at the station in Sittard, while waiting until I could travel at 9. Train-trip took 2.5 hours from there. Out the backside of the station I went, onto the ferry that would take me to the busstop, and at 12.15 we saw each other for the first time since my granddad died in 1983.
It was like we had been visiting for all the years we hadn't seen each other. Well, except for questions like, how old are the girls, where do you work, how long have you lived here, and "OH! CAN'T BELIEVE YOU HAVE A GARDEN IN AMSTERDAM!!" LOL, but it was really comfortable. We had lunch (eierkoek with strawberries ARE the best!) and than started on the pictures. She had started separating them, but if you don't know who you're looking at, there are going to be way too many stacks to make it really organized ;-) We looked at the different packets she had made, and A LOT of new information surfaced. we also made the decision, I would take one packet home, scan them, and return the originals to her for safe keeping and take the next stack, untill all pictures and memorabelia's were scanned and returned. I would send some of the scans to my dad, to see if he recognized people, because (This is going to sound obnoxious, but it's not meant that way. ) most people in the pictures are younger, most having lived through the Second World War, and by the time I met them, they were already old, and not just because I was 10. LOL.
So this will keep me occupied in a good way. I have limited myself to one hour of scanning a day, or figuring connections, and only on days that Mike is off. I know me... if I don't set boundaries I'll keep at it until I'm done to the detriment of anything else. I'm learning.... boundaries are good :-)
Last year I tried the concept "change is good" but I'm not yet on board with that one. LOL.
(I wonder what's next on that list of life's lessons to learn.... "Love thy fellow man"? Hope not, there's some serious wankers out there!)
No news yet from Mikes job, as indicated, no news yet on my business, only more and more things to figure out, decisions to consider and more of the same that put me on the ropes a couple of months ago, but I've made a decision on that as well......
- Make plan and stick to it,
- until something gums up the works,
- adjust course and lett-her-rip!
Not sure if it is a healthy approach for the long haul, but for now, it will have to do. If you have any ideas on the subject, let me know?
My sister has a new roommate. D E R E A M Y! If he wasn't hers, I'd seriously consider of stealing him! Meet Tommy.......
Not sure what you were thinking..... :-)
He's a Australian Shepherd/Border Collie mix, and just the cutest little hellcat you could wish for. LOL. I'm sure you'll see him come by once or twice more....
we also discovered we have really big gophers at the castle......
So, I guess this is my longwinded way of saying.... "SHE'S BAAAAAACK!"
Don't forget to hug a loved one?
Hugs,
Pauli
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