When I started writing this post on December 14, all was still right in my world. I was going to tell you about our unofficial plans and the things we were looking forward to experiencing and planning..........
It is now Januari 5th, and my world is shattered. Mike, my heart, my rock, my soulmate died on December 16 and I said my final goodbye on Christmas Eve.
It was very unexpectedly and even the hospital was at a loss of what happened and how fast it happened.
He was ok and on the mend, and than he was gone....... I feel like I severely failed him, like I should have insisted on "more" should have taken care of him better, faught for him harder......... Secondguessing telling the doctor that we each had decided that if the time came, neither one of us wanted to become a vegetable, and to not let the other suffer..... "What if 's" are running rampant at this time...... I'll be off the air for a while, got things to still take care of, got things to digest, things to figure out and a lot of things to come to terms with.....
